Thursday, January 18, 2007

What is this an inquisition? (Part 2)

Day 6 of the winter storm 2007, and still couped up. No one has lost their mind (...yet). But I have found another quiz. This one is more practical and I felt better after seeing my results of this one. By the way, intellectual doesn't mean smart. It just means that I can fill out quizes like the other day. And being contemplative and intellectual at the same time, means I need to get out more.

What's your Style? Find out here.

Natualists: 7
Naturalists Draw near to God through nature.

Sensate: 8
Sensates draw near to God through the senses.

Traditionalists: 11
Traditionalists draw near to God through ritual and symbol.

Ascetics: 9
Ascetics draw near to God through solitude and simplicity.

Activists: 11
Activists draw near to God through bringing about social change.

Caregivers: 9
Caregivers draw near to God through caring for and serving others.

Enthusiast: 16
Enthusiasts draw near to God through celebration and mystery.

Contemplative: 20
Contemplatives draw near to God through personal adoration and heartfelt devotion.

Intellectual: 24
Intellectuals draw near to God through their minds.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

What is this, an inquisition?

Staying home for a couple of days has left me surfing the web through my “cans tied to a string” telephone lines. I ran across these quizzes that I am sure will only be interesting to seminary students and alumni. But even if you are neither one, God loves you the same, and I think anyone can fill these out. I also believe you don’t need a seminary degree to have fun.

They are quizzes that claim to determine your theological worldview and whether or not you are a heretic? Just to keep everything in perspective, some of these questions are loaded. Some of them also may require you to pretend to be Catholic. They may cause you to get out your wikipedia’s and if they cause you to get out your Bibles, even better. The ironic thing is at the end of both of them, an ad for “mood rings” pops up.

The funny thing is that I took them both and to be honest I got worried on some questions. I thought to myself, “why am I getting so nervous?” As if the results would tally up and all of sudden the Spanish inquisition would bust down the door and haul me away. I guess it was all those years at seminary watching others pointing fingers at preachers and pastors who did not comply with their own traditions, practices, and teachings. Some of it was justified since you can’t really hold up truth unless you compare it to falsehood. Anyhoo, I suddenly came to myself midway through the interrogation and thought “this is silly, I believe the Bible is my only authority, not seminary, or any student, alumni, or peer.” And by Bible, I mean God who wrote it and gave it to us. So for a typical people pleaser, this is a small breakthrough. Here are my results, I now can be officially labeled. Take both of them, so I can compare myself to you and see if I’m ok.

You scored as Chalcedon compliant. You are Chalcedon compliant. Congratulations, you're not a heretic. You believe that Jesus is truly God and truly man and like us in every respect, apart from sin. Officially approved in 451.

Chalcedon compliant



























Take the quiz:
Are you a heretic?
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan. You are an evangelical in the Wesleyan tradition. You believe that God's grace enables you to choose to believe in him, even though you yourself are totally depraved. The gift of the Holy Spirit gives you assurance of your salvation, and he also enables you to live the life of obedience to which God has called us. You are influenced heavly by John Wesley and the Methodists.

Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan


Reformed Evangelical


Neo orthodox








Classical Liberal


Roman Catholic


Modern Liberal

Take the quiz:
What's your theological worldview?
created with QuizFarm.com

Sunday, January 14, 2007

Dad's Day Off

Sundays are usually work days for me, but today the Boss gave me the day off. So after some family worship time (I could not let that sermon go to waste), we went sledding. I thought it was the perfect day to go sledding with all the sleet that had fallen the last two days. I soon discovered that sleet is better when it has had time to melt and get “slick.” I was thankful for God giving us some quality family time, but I will give you two guesses on how many times we did this.

Saturday, January 13, 2007

What Fig Leaves?

For my birthday, my parents took Chris and I to a very nice steakhouse. We had a great time of visiting and laughing. We also had a very chatty waiter. As the meal went on, he kept referring to his “significant other” and “his better half.” Now I will admit here that I am not always the sharpest tool in the shed, so along about dessert I began to think,

“Why does he keep phrasing it that way? It is so awkward. Why not just say ‘my wife’? It would be so much easier, oh wait, maybe they're not married. Of course, he could just say fiancé or girlfriend. No, he is wearing a wedding ring. So why not just say ‘wife’ unless she is not…Oh."

Then I began to think about how much we as humans want our sin to be socially acceptable. We rename and repackage it, trying desperately to surround ourselves with others who will join in this charade with us. So we say we have “self-control issues” instead of just admitting we have rage. We say she is a "talker" rather than a gossip. Whatever our bully sin is, there is a way to present it in a more positive light. This desire is what makes it so easy for me to see a splinter in my brother’s eye and miss the plank in my own. It is what makes me able to “strain out a gnat, yet gulp down a camel!” (Matthew 23:24)
How this must break the heart of God to see His children still running around grabbing leaves to cover what they don’t want everyone to see and trying to hide from Him. God wants a real relationship with me, and He wants me to have real relationships with others. But this is not possible as long as I am covering, repackaging and hiding. Only through Jesus is this possible. Even now, God’s call echoes through Scripture to each of us, calling us to lay down our false coverings and be cleansed, for real. “Come now and let us reason together, says the Lord. Though your sins be like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be like wool.” Isaiah 1:18

Thursday, January 11, 2007

One Blind Mouse

The other night, my wife did a supernatural thing. She woke me up at three in the morning. If you know how I sleep, you will know that I am not exaggerating when I say it was supernatural. She did not wake me up because someone was breaking in. She did not wake me up because there was a loud storm crashing down on the house. No, she woke me up because of a chatty mouse.

Now I don't mind that mice are living in my house. I don't really know what I want more...a cat or mice. I only wish that they would shut up! I was a good husband though. I got up and looked around and said "I don't see him." The fact that my eyes were still sleeping is irrelevant. The next day we laid out a trap -- the sticky kind so that we actually get to watch them scream as we throw them in the garbage. Hey, its a lot better than if our dog gets to them first. You don't want to know.

We got up in the middle of the next night and saw that the sticky trap was gone. So, not only do we have a chatty mouse but now he is clunking into everything because he can't see where he is going.

That first night, since I couldn't go back to sleep, I went into the living room and wondered how my wife got her satellite hearing. Then God reminded me that His voice is to be heard exactly like that. Jesus once said that His sheep know His voice. The interesting thing about what He said in John 10, is that before and after that moment He spoke to the Jews about not believing in Him as the Messiah - The Savior. He said to those around Him that day, who were being hesitant and reserved in believing in Him, "I told you, and you do not believe; the works that I do in My Father's name, these testify of Me. But you do not believe because you are not of My sheep" (John 10:25-26).

To put it bluntly, I can't hear God's voice in my life until I have given my life to Him. Until I trust Him with everything, I will be deaf to God. This is clear especially in the crisis of my life. I don't hear his voice of comfort and guidance until I recognize and accept the fact that He is in control of the storm of my life. And hearing His voice in the midst of a storm makes all the difference in the world. When I believe Jesus Christ is who He said He is, I get satellite hearing. I can only hear the voices I trust.

By the way, two days later, the dog got to the mouse. Of course, its not hard catching a mouse running with a big piece of cardboard around his neck.